By Toronto Life & Mindset Alignment Coach Stephanie J. Marshall

Don’t make the same mistakes I did. Ten years ago I was driving home after Labour Day weekend at the cottage and the closer I got, the worse I felt. The end of summer meant back to “reality” and back to a job in which my ambivalence was suffocating me. I couldn’t seem to find the motivation that used to come to me easily and if I was being honest, I knew I was on borrowed time because I was phoning it in.

I wanted to escape, but looking at other jobs out there wasn’t inspiring me either. I procrastinated. I went through the motions of saving jobs on LinkedIn that I thought I should apply for but knew I would put it off until past the application deadlines (anyone else do that?). I was still paying off my MBA and felt stuck on a corporate path of my own making.

I fantasized about winning the lottery and getting a fresh start because none of the more realistic options seemed possible. Or they seemed exhausting. Or expensive. *Spoiler alert, I did not win the lottery.

I wish I could say that I suddenly saw what was hiding in my blind spots and realized that I was going to stay stuck forever unless I changed the way I was looking at things and my approach. But the truth is that I stayed stuck for a few more years until I was laid off, and then I muddled about a little longer until, after a whole lot of trial and error, I got on the right path.

I could have gotten here a hell of a lot sooner.

If someone had pushed and encouraged me the right way and shown me how to get out of my own head and my assumptions, if I had understood how exactly my own thoughts and feelings were contributing to the problem, had I been able to apply critical thinking skills to my actual life, I would have saved years.

I wish I had known that I didn’t need an escape, I needed to change what I had been doing and how I had been approaching everything I wasn’t happy about.

But at least I’m a better coach now because of it, because of my stubborn side, the part of me that doesn’t naturally ask for help, I had to learn the hard way. And I have a whole lot of great stories about how to do it wrong. I know firsthand how much easier and faster it can be. When you feel stuck it feels real and it feels permanent, but know that there is a way out, back to a life that thrills you.

Life isn’t perfect now, but I know that I’m never going to let myself slip into complacency, and I know that when I need to take a turn, I can do it much faster.

I want to show you the fast way.

P.S. Find out how to work with me if you're ready to break the patterns keeping you stuck and get out of your own way: Let's talk.

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