Where Do You Start When Everything is F*ck$d?
I’m going to start by reminding you that you’ve got this. No matter what.
Sometimes it feels like everything is f*ck$ed all at once and it’s overwhelming.
- Maybe your career isn’t where you want it to be.
- Or your relationship could use some attention.
- You’re behind on that stuff for your kids or your parents.
- You know you should be eating better and sleeping more.
And according to the news the world is descending into chaos on all fronts…
You might feel like you should be doing more, but you don’t know where to start because it feels like nothing will make a big enough difference right now, and you just want some relief and to feel like yourself.
If this is you, take a moment to stop trying to convince yourself to do more, it will only add to the overwhelm and make it even harder to get into action. And if you have a habit of being hard on yourself, take a moment to stop that too, it makes things worse.
When it feels like everything is f*ck$ed all at once it’s easy to get lost in the overwhelm, but if you want to get back to feeling like yourself you have to do two things:
1. Get to the “Now What?”
The “Now what?” stage is where you take inventory and accept what is, what you can’t change this second, and take responsibility for what you can control going forward. No more, no less. Denial and avoidance and self-blame don’t work long term.
The “Now what?” stage is where you remember who you are, who you want to be, and how you want to show up in the world.
2. Decide
Simply decide where to start based on what you think will get the ball rolling and follow through. The truth is that there is no perfect place to start, just decide based on the following:
-
- Keep it simple, something where you know what the next steps could be and they are doable. It’s okay to start small.
- Something that will give you a little bit of whatever feeling you’re craving the most right now: connection, order, satisfaction, fun, winning.
Alignment Makes it Easier
The Alignment Coaching process helps you build the skills of getting to “Now what?” and making confident decisions. It becomes a habit.
The tools help you see all of the different parts of your life and how they fit together. You examine the big picture, the day to day, what matters to you, what’s helping you and what’s messing with you. It’s all interconnected and you will understand the impact of your perspective and the decisions you’ve been making without judgement.
With that level of clarity, it’s easier to get to the “Now what?” and not only see where to start, but also where you can take it next if you keep going.
You will feel like yourself again. In coaching, you show up as you are, and I guide you and support you to focus on what matters to you and to keep taking action to move forward even through the ups and downs. I fight for you to stay on your own team and remind you of why you want to stay committed to yourself.
As you build the habit of getting to the “Now what?” and making decisions you’re going to stop trying to do everything at once and exhausting yourself. You’re going to be more intentional because every decision you make adds up. When you know what you’re working toward you’re going to feel more energized and have more to give.
You’ve got this.
-SJM
Not ready to talk?
Start with my FREE mini starter course:
KICKSTART: THE FIRST STEP
Make the decision that changes everything else.
Clarity, commitment, and forward motion. Ten minutes a day. Starting now.
Avoiding Discomfort Feels Smart. But Have You Seen the Trap?
Why Avoiding Discomfort Feels Safe but Keeps You StuckDon’t have time? The brief: Playing it safe usually doesn’t look like fear. It looks like reasonable choices that slowly shrink your life. Avoidance rarely feels dramatic. It feels like relief, timing, or being...
You’re Not Failing at Discipline. You’re Fighting for Control.
The Inner Rebel Isn’t Always Wrong There’s a difference between spiralling and deciding to go feral on purpose. Last week I worked past 2:30am three nights in a row, and not because I had a deadline. I made a choice. My sleep got off track after over-scheduling myself...
Feeling Stuck in Life? You Don’t Need a Plan to Move Forward
You Don’t Have to Know Where You’re Going to Stop Walking in Circles People don’t get stuck because they’re lazy. Or unmotivated. Or broken. They get stuck because they believe a lie that sounds like wisdom:You need to know where you’re going before you can start. So...