The Perfect Holidays in Three Easy Steps:
How to enjoy the holidays as much as the people in holiday movies in three easy steps:
- Buy a really big house and decorate it extensively
- Create some family drama now and resolve it on Christmas
- Be confident that in the end there will be merriment, a feast that someone cooked, and probably singing.
Easy right? But seriously, what I most commonly hear from women is this time of year is that they have too much to do it all falls on them, and if they don’t do it, no one else will.
And so the annual overwhelm, irritation, and resentment begins.
The Choices
The thing is, you can choose to do things differently.
You get to decide how to spend your time, money, and energy. And if you are doing-all-the-things because you don’t want to deal with other people’s reactions to your not doing them, that’s a choice too.
So what would it look like to only do the things you wanted to do with the people you wanted to do them with? How different is that from what you are currently doing?
Choices don’t always feel like a choice, especially when there is no choice that makes everyone happy (any people pleasers in the house?). But forgetting that something is a choice is a direct route to resignation.
Zooming Out for Alignment
To stay grounded by tying in the big picture. Imagine 10 years from now:
Who do you want to be?
How do you want to live?
Are you allowing yourself to get overwhelmed or doing things with resentment?
Your decisions today are building the path to that future, and the sooner you start making decisions that align with what you want, the sooner you will get there. Things don’t change all at once, but when you have decided what you want to move towards, you won’t get caught in the weeds and feel powerless.*
This is at the heart of the Kickstartology Alignment Framework.
Deciding for You
In Kickstartology Coaching we practice using the Alignment Coaching Framework to make quick and confident decisions in the moment. You’ll learn to be more comfortable saying no and not pleasing everyone, so that you can say yes to yourself when it matters most. And when you learn to say yes to yourself you will find that you have more to give. More energy, more joy, more patience, and more love.
Isn’t that what holiday movies are all about? Except Die Hard. That’s more about killing bad guys.
Book a call with me to talk about Kickstartology coaching so that you can learn how to navigate through busyness and expectations without uninvited overwhelm, stress, or resentment. Learn how to stop these patterns so that you can enjoy the good parts more and change the bad parts. Imagine loving the holidays and feeling refreshed, satisfied, and ready when “real life” starts up again in January.
-Stephanie
*Some things to keep in mind:
- It doesn’t have to look the same every year
- No matter how hard you try, you can’t be everything to everyone
- Some people get mad about any change but they usually get over it
- Perfection isn’t real (no matter how organized you are)
- You’re allowed to love a little chaos and last minute stress (Hi Steph W.)
- You’re allowed to not do everything without guilt (Hi Theresa L.)
- You will eventually have to deal with the financial decisions you make now
- You get to decide whose judgements matter (I love the saying “don’t take criticism from someone you wouldn’t take advice from”)
P.S. Find out how to work with me if you're ready to break the patterns keeping you stuck and get out of your own way: Let's talk.
Book a free coaching exploration call and I will tell you everything you need to know and what results you can expect with my group coaching program for women or 1-on-1 coaching.
Free: Get unstuck with our mini starter course:
KICKSTART: THE FIRST STEP
Submit to receive an email with the download link.
How to Make Getting Up Compelling
You "Should" Get Up Early Trying to talk yourself into getting up early because you "should" just makes it less compelling. Using fear or shame to motivate yourself is not a good strategy, it may occasionally work in the short term, but it has been proven to be...
What is it Like to be Coached by a Life Coach?
Being Coached is Like... I’m not a cook and I’m always amazed at those people who know what they’re doing in a kitchen… which lead me to this thought: Coaching is like having a master chef come into your kitchen, look at all the ingredients and tools, and then help...
Self Sabotage: Top 10 Ways Women Get In Their Own Way
By Toronto Life & Mindset Alignment Coach Stephanie J. Marshall How Women Self Sabotage: When I'm on a consult call with someone and I ask what their biggest obstacle is, often they say "I am". For so many women, self-sabotage sucks up a lot of time, mental...