WTF is a Mindset Reset and Why is it Practical?

We think between 60,000-80,000 thoughts a day, and most of our brain activity is done on autopilot.

If we had to question all of our thoughts we would be unable to function. Can you imagine?

  • Do I like dogs?… Every time I see one.
  • How do I put pants on? That would slow down my mornings.
  • I’m a really shitty dancer. I don’t need to question this.

Autopilot thinking takes up less mental energy and we move along believing our own thoughts and reinforcing our thought habits. These thought habits are what we talk about when we say “mindset”.

For example (to continue from one of my thoughts above) all of my conscious and subconscious thoughts about dancing create my “mindset about dancing”.

Why Mindset Matters SO Much:

Your thoughts cause your feelings and drive all of your decisions: What you do (or don’t), how you do it, and your attitude. Your mindset reflects what you notice, what you think is possible or impossible, and what you believe about yourself.

Your thoughts are at the root of everything.

What is often overlooked

If this is new to you it might seem exaggerated. That’s normal.

Keep these three things in mind:

  1. It doesn’t matter if your thoughts are true or not (they always feel true), what matters is if they are working for you.
  2. Denial, blind optimism, trying to convince yourself, or lying to yourself doesn’t work (so point #1 is not a loophole or a shortcut).
  3. You can’t control everything but thought work trains you to keep going back to what you can.

The Aligned Mindset:

The Aligned Mindset is one in which the thoughts you are focusing on (including your thoughts about yourself) are working for you, for who you want to be, how you want to live, and what you want to do.

In other words, your thoughts are helping you and not getting in your way.

The Aligned Mindset Reset: A Mini Example

I wish I could dance

Let’s keep talking about my dancing:

Most of us have been conditioned to focus on what we need to do without first examining our mindset. For example, I frequently think that I would love to learn how to dance (yes hello Tiktok). I start thinking about classes I could take, or video series I could follow, and then I don’t do anything.

This is not surprising if I look at what thoughts I have about dancing

Mindset Reset Step 1: What thoughts do you currently have?
(fyi, doing this thought exploration in real time as I write this – these are the first 5 thoughts that came up)

  1. I really wish I could dance.
  2. I’m a really shitty dancer. I dance like a bad Gen X meme.
  3. It’s harder for me to learn to dance than other people.
  4. I don’t have time to practice.
  5. I don’t know where to start.

No wonder I’ve never gotten past the half-assed thoughts about trying.

Mindset Reset Step 2: How are your current thoughts working for you?
My first thought makes me interested in pursuing it, but the next four are just demoralizing, hence I take zero action.

Mindset Reset Step 3: What else feels true?
Since lying to myself won’t work there is no point in trying to convince myself that I’m a good dancer or that it will work. But what I can do is look at this objectively to see what I else believe. Do I have more useful thoughts hiding? My coach calls this “mining your brain”.

Thoughts I also believe:

  1. Learning some basics could go a really long way.
  2. I’m sure that there are people worse than me who have learned.
  3. It would be fun to break into dance moves and surprise people.
  4. Even an imperfect 15 minutes a few times a week could really add up.
  5. I can figure this out if I want to (but I’m not sure if I do).

Mindset Reset Step 4: Now what?
When I think of learning how to dance my autopilot settings go to the first five thoughts that stop me from doing anything.

But the thoughts I uncovered make me start imagining doing it. It’s this curiosity that could propel me into action.

If I decide to go for it I would start by working on replacing my autopilot thoughts with those that came out of the thought exploration.

P.S. ALERT: A new cohort of our Kickstartology Alignment Coaching Program is starting soon! You can book a call to find out everything you need to know:
Book a complimentary coaching exploration call

P.P.S. Sign up for our newsletter to get weekly coaching tips and to find out first about our upcoming workshops.

Download our free starter course:


Submit your info and you will receive an email with the download link:

* indicates required

Not ready for live coaching but want to take a step forward?

Download our free starter course:

Submit your info and you will receive an email with the download link. 


* indicates required
Honest Talk About Coaching

Honest Talk About Coaching

By Stephanie J. Marshall, Toronto-based Master Alignment Coach The Blunt Talk I've been holding back because I don't want to scare you away from coaching, but I don't think it's been serving either one of us. I've been scared that if I'm too blunt with you up-front...

How to Find Your Spark in Midlife

How to Find Your Spark in Midlife

For many midlife women, finding one's spark in your forties and fifties might leave you scratching your head, frustrated, or even exhausted at the prospect of making the effort. The good news is that no matter how disconnected you feel right now, you can find your...

The September Reset

The September Reset

By Stephanie J. Marshall, Toronto-based Master Alignment CoachThat September Reset Feeling Hands up if you chase that fresh start, September back to school feeling every fall!! September is the real new year, and the back to school high comes from the feeling that...