By Stephanie Marshall, Toronto based Master Alignment Coach
Shouldn’t people my age have already _____?
I’ve felt this. Feeling behind because I didn’t seem to measure up when I compared myself to people around me, to what was expected of me. I didn’t tell anyone. Now as a coach I’ve had countless women tell me why they think are so behind. Why at 30 they should have ticked certain boxes, why they need to reach certain milestones by 40, what has to happen before 50, why they will be a failure if by 60 they haven’t…
A lot of people joke about “adulting” and it’s because we all have a sense of what it should look like and we can’t help but compare ourselves.
You’re Not Behind; You’re Just on Your Own Path
It’s all bullshit. You’re not behind, it’s not too late, you’re not too old. You can stop playing catch up right now and start where you are. You might want to argue and try to justify why you really are SO BEHIND but let me offer something else.
You can focus on what’s next. My clients are making leaps they didn’t believe were possible because they broke out of the pattern of trying to catch up. They are changing careers, landing dream jobs, finding great partners, and buying real estate, all because they learned how to stop bringing the judgments and the “shoulds” into their decision-making.
They were able to see more possibilities to get what they want and take advantage of where they were starting from and what they already had.
And no matter how behind you feel, you can learn how to start getting out of your own way with this “I’m so behind” stuff. Learn what happens when you change your approach to connect to what you really want, and when you stop chasing milestones on a list.
P.P.P.S. Our client, Hanna, says it best:
“Kickstartology Coaching offers a mix of brain tools, challenge, community, encouragement, and consistency. The openness of the Kickstartology team and of my fellow program participants has helped me envision my future, create a blueprint for the way I want to show up in the world, and start building the habits I want in my life."
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